Train Up a Child

paper familyMaybe you have heard of the recent child-rearing fad: gender neutral parenting. In this non-directive approach, children are raised in a gender neutral environment—no “boys” colors or “girls” toys. They are left with the paramount responsibility of choosing the gender they feel most comfortable identifying with later in childhood or in adolescence. Boundaries and limitations are balked at—boys can wear girl’s clothes and vice-versa. There are no distinctions.

This is not God’s way. God invented distinction, and He called it good: Creator and created, light and dark, male and female. Distinction is what separates God’s design for His creation from paganism.

Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” In the Bible, parents are exhorted to train their children, and children long for such instruction. What a heavy burden it is for a child to name oneself. My heart grieves for these children who are longing for the blessing of their gender from Mom and Dad. Minus the intervention of Jesus, they will struggle well into adulthood, trying to find the way they should go.

And so we must stand in the gap. I exhort you, Beloved, BLESS AND AFFIRM the gender of every child you encounter. You can say things like, to a little girl, “What a pretty dress you are wearing. You’re so beautiful!” Or, “Girls are awesome!” To a little boy, “I love the tower you built. Boys rock!” Or, “What you just did was very manly.” These little boys and girls need the voice of the Church right now—yours and mine together—to champion them.

About Nate Oyloe

Nate Oyloe is Outpost's Director and is Senior Pastor of Twin Cities Justice House of Prayer.