Simon Says

By Outpost Admin, Dan P. on June 12, 2018

Dave RSimon says, “Retire!” This month, we acknowledge and celebrate Dave Rasmussen, former director of Simon Ministries, and Outpost’s Married Couples Coordinator. Dave is a man who has faithfully ministered to Jesus, his wife Diane, and to many other married couples for nearly 20 years.

Humble Beginnings

I first met Dave Rasmussen in 1997 at his intake interview for Joshua Fellowship (JF). Back then, JF was the only group at Outpost Ministries. It was for any and all men struggling with unwanted same-sex attractions who sought to align their sexuality with their spirituality. We met on the second, third, fourth and fifth Mondays of each month. The first Monday was open to anyone and all people interested in learning about and participating in Outpost programming.

After several months in JF, I asked Dave if he and his wife would be willing to share their story of faith and healing at one of the open meetings. He immediately agreed to do that. Completely unbeknownst to me, Dave was shaking in his boots—not because of the prospect of sharing his story, but because he hadn’t shared “enough” of his story with his wife, Diane.

So he scurried home, shared “the rest of the story” with Diane and started to prepare to share. Well, the open meeting was a smash hit, both for Dave and for Outpost Ministries. We have a saying around here, “There is no transformation without sharing.” Dave and his marriage were transformed because of that open meeting in 1998. It was a catalyst that propelled both Dave and Diane further in their healing journey together.

Simon Ministries is Born

Dave and Diane later started an outreach of their own seeking to help married couples dealing with issues of homosexuality. They named their ministry Simon Ministries after Simon of Cyrene, the man the Roman soldiers conscripted to carry the cross of Jesus. For 15 years, the Rasmussens would minister faithfully out of their church to these married couples, lead Living Waters groups, be the regional representative for a national ministry group, and correspond with and mentor many people by mail and email.

Joining Forces

Then in 2012, through a series of practical decisions, Simon Ministries closed its doors, and Dave came to work at Outpost. He brought the renamed Simon’s Refuge ministry to married couples with him. He has continued much of the same ministry activity at Outpost, additionally overseeing the Caleb Spirit ministry for men over 30.

Leading the Way

This month also marks Dave’s “real” retirement. He first retired from a telephone company back in 2003. Dave is actually the first person ever to retire from Outpost. In the 1970s and 80s, the ministry saw several leaders leave because of burnout. In the 90s, we saw the death of our beloved ministry leader, Joe Hallett, who had lived a life with AIDS for many years. In retiring, Dave is setting a new precedent for ministry leaders here. We are now on a new leadership trajectory, and Dave is leading the way!

Standing Out

In an age where the sanctity of marriage is disregarded, and one’s feelings, attractions, and self-determination are king, Dave and Diane’s commitment to Christ and to one another stands out in noteworthy brilliance. We gratefully acknowledge Dave’s commitment to Jesus Christ and the fulfillment of His mission alongside us here at Outpost Ministries.

Congratulations on your retirement, Dave! May you and Diane have many happy and healthy years together, enjoying all of God’s blessings in Jesus Christ!

Subscribe to our newsletter!

Filed Under: Is Healing Possible in My Marriage?, Outpost News Tagged With: , , , , ,

Voices Q & A: Husbands and Wives

By Dave R. on June 12, 2018

fork in the roadQ: If a husband struggles with same-sex attractions, why should he stay with his wife? Wouldn’t they both be better off going their separate ways?

A: Diane and I were committed to our marriage. We loved each other. The gay community was about youth and good looks. Diane loves me unconditionally!

There was always a voice inside me that said what I was doing—sexually acting out with other men—was wrong. I also had other people in my life who would be affected, especially my sons, and also my siblings, my in-laws, my mother, my dear friends. Their relationships were more important to me than my selfish, carnal desires.

Divorce was never an option for me. We knew it would be a battle, but we persevered, thanks to our Lord Jesus.

As Robert Frost once wrote, Diane and I “took the [road] less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.”

Subscribe to our newsletter!

 

 

Filed Under: Is Healing Possible in My Marriage?, Outpost News, Voices Tagged With: , , , , ,

Still Shining, Still Growing!

By Nate Oyloe on August 22, 2017

growingOver 40 years ago, God had a plan for Outpost Ministries. Knowing the trajectory of culture, He made a way for those struggling with unwanted same-sex attractions. He established this ministry to stand for the truth of God’s Word in the wave of delusion that would soon wash over this great nation.

Forty one years later, we are still a beacon of hope to the sexually and relationally broken and their families. And we are growing!

A few months ago, I wrote about Outpost North, our branch office in Brainerd, MN. Now I’m excited to tell you about two other expanding programs.

Living Waters

Living Waters is a 20-week, closed group for men and women seeking healing in their lives. It includes worship, teaching and small-group prayer ministry. Ultimately, we learn how to press into Jesus more deeply, allowing Him to meet our needs and transform us for His Kingdom purposes. We have been running Living Waters as a regular part of our programming for many years. This year we will not only run a group in the North Metro area of the Twin Cities but also one in the South.

Elijah Company South

As you may have read, Elijah Company is a group for parents, family and friends of those impacted by homosexuality. The group provides prayer and support for its participants. This fall, this group will be held in both the North and South Metro areas as well.

I am so blessed to see the Lord continuing to expand this much needed ministry in this hour. Jesus Christ has life-changing power for ALL who will turn from their sinful ways and make Him the Lord of their life.

Once again, I thank you for all your prayers and financial support. We cannot do this without you. Let’s us continue to stand in the gap for those who so desperately need the transforming love of our Savior Jesus. He is able to do more than we can ask or imagine.

Subscribe to our newsletter!

Filed Under: Archive, Is Freedom Possible?, Is Healing Possible in My Marriage?, Outpost News, What Should I Do as a Parent?, Who Is Outpost? Tagged With: , , ,

Living Waters

By Jean on August 16, 2016
Living Waters

Photo from Free Images

It is with joy and thankfulness that I am reporting on the conclusion of our 2015-16 Living Waters Program at the end of March.  Living Waters is an in-depth healing and discipleship group for any Christian seeking healing in areas of sexual and relational brokenness.  Living Waters is for EVERYONE!  Each one of us is a good gift from God; most of us are broken in our ability to love others well.  Living Waters lays a biblical foundation for sexual and relational wholeness in our lives.

After 21 weeks of intense worship, teaching and small group prayer, our participants testified to the change that had taken place as a result of the work of the Holy Spirit in their lives. With their permission, here are their testimonies:

Through Living Waters, God showed me that at a deep level I had, in my woundedness, despised and rejected my gender and therefore, myself.  I learned so much through the truths expressed in the beautifully articulated, biblical and comprehensive Living Waters textbook about how Christ’s work on the cross can bring deep healing.  Through the teachings aided by the caring ministry and prayers of others, God’s Spirit gently enabled me to begin to accept the self that He made me to be.  This ‘real me’ was then able to begin to receive His love and perfect parenting in new ways, and turn from many broken ways.  I notice a new contentedness and growing joy in accepting who I am in Him.

Living Waters brought healing to my spirit especially from an abusive relationship with my ex-boyfriend.  By dealing with past wounds and traumas, I received healing!

 I came to Living Waters confused and scared.  I’m leaving with hope for my marriage!

I came to Living Waters feeling so broken.  I had just come out of a relationship where the man was very godly and good to me but I could not receive his love.  The more he tried to love me, the more I pushed him away.  Throughout Living Waters, the idea that God made me to be a good gift continually ministered to my heart.  For so many years after being in an abusive relationship, I believed that I was the problem and I had carried a huge yoke of shame.  Through the ‘cross time’, the Holy Spirit has been restoring my sense of worth and that I actually have much to give!

It started out with me coming because a friend invited me, but I got so much more out of it than I thought possible!  I’ve always had issues with anxiety, self-hatred and mild depression.  I didn’t think Living Waters was going to be able to help me with that, but it DID!  I was able to uncover things that I never thought were issues, things I thought were buried in the past and long forgotten. I never knew my revulsion toward the feminine and my desire to be a boy when I was younger God used Living Waters greatly in my life.  God showed me so much about my identity in Him instead of my sins of the past.  I’ve also grown much closer to God in my intimacy with Him.

I initially came because my wife required me to seek some kind of counseling.  I wanted to change but had been let down by so many counselors and groups that went nowhere that I was skeptical Living Waters would be any different.  In the end, I’m glad I came.  Small group was a highlight and removed my skepticism that groups can experience change and actually bond vs. being strangers stuck in a rut.  Seeing others who had overcome the same sins and struggles that had plagued me for years was very encouraging.  Becoming that person thanks to Living Waters and my church is incredibly edifying.

Living Waters has made me realize my need for community and also the importance of being in authentic relationships with others.

This has been the most beneficial course I have ever experienced regarding sexual issues and their root causes.  I have been able to walk with less shame and more transparency.  I now see my need is not so much to flee sexual sin as it is to turn away from idolatry of God’s creation while seeking and worshiping my loving Heavenly Father.  My past had isolated me in my sin, but now I see the value and ability to have real and deeply Christ-ministering relationships with other men.

The 2016-17 Living Waters Program will be starting in October 2016 and will run through March 2017.  We are now accepting applications! Applications are available on our Living Waters page.  Sign up early to ensure a place in the program, as space is limited.  Tell your friends to come!  They will be glad you referred them!

Filed Under: Archive, How Do I Change?, Is Freedom Possible?, Is Healing Possible in My Marriage?, Outpost News Tagged With: , , , ,

Learning to Trust: A Wife’s Journey

By Diane R. on June 21, 2016

wedding ringsI am the wife of a man who struggled with same-sex attractions in isolation for more than 25 years of our marriage.

I am also a sister, niece, godmother, aunt and neighbor to individuals who have identified as gay. The Lord has wanted me to deal with the issue of homosexuality and to experience the pain He feels for His children at a deeper level than most people. But the Lord first had lessons to teach me and wounds to heal in me before that could take place. Two of those areas in my life were in trust and forgiveness.

My husband Dave and I were high school sweethearts. He was gentle and kind, and I fell in love with him on the very first date. He was safe! I needed someone who was safe after being sexually abused by my grandfather for two years as a child. I needed someone I could trust, and I could trust Dave!

However, one month before we were to be married, Dave came to me and told me that he dealt with same-sex attractions and had also contracted an STD from a man. He expected that I would call off the wedding. I did not! I was naïve, and I loved him too much to let him go. We both assumed marriage would change him.  But my trust in him was broken.

I resorted to trusting in alcohol to kill my pain. I began parking outside gay bars because I was paranoid about what Dave was doing. Six years into our marriage, Jesus came in and, as our Lord and Savior, took over both of our lives. I had to learn to trust the Lord, and He gave me the ability to completely trust Dave again and no longer doubt his fidelity.

I needed to trust God after eight years of marriage and no children. We then adopted the first of our two sons—a special needs child with hydrocephalus, a son given a prognosis of severe retardation. I had to trust God for what He was going to do in my son’s life, if anything!

I had to trust God when, after 10 years of marriage, He blessed me by allowing me to become pregnant—telling me in prayer “this child is sanctified by Me”—only to take that child away by miscarriage the very next day. I cried out to God because I could not understand why. Then a dear friend told me ‘sanctified’ means, ‘taken from the world and given back to God.’ I had to forgive God for not giving me what I wanted. Then in my arrogance, He humbled me to ask for forgiveness for not trusting that He knew what was best for me.

In the two years following, I had to trust God when my son went through brain surgery and when the Lord took two more children away through miscarriage. Dave, with the stress and pain he felt at home, decided to get away and think about whether or not he should end the marriage and go into the gay life.

It hurt too much to keep this secret anymore. I confided in a man who was mentoring Dave that he had left. I also told Dave he had to confide in his mentor about his struggle before he even thought about coming home. I put all my trust in God that He would work this out in Dave. He did! Dave’s love of God and love for his family was strong!

He came back and said that he was ‘in it for the long haul.’ He started his long healing journey of being ‘called out’ of homosexuality. I was able to forgive him and trust in Jesus.

In 1997, Dave asked if he could go to Outpost. Within a few months, I joined him at what were at that time open meetings, and I gained such a love and respect for all the men there. After a few months, Outpost leaders asked us to give our testimony at an open meeting. Five days before we were to give our testimony, Dave said we should discuss what the other was going to say so there would be no surprises! That was when I found out about David’s numerous anonymous homosexual encounters for almost 27 years of our marriage. He assumed I knew and asked for my forgiveness. The day had come when I would need to forgive the most! The first words out of my mouth were, “I can’t!” Then God gave me another lesson in forgiveness: He showed me all the times that my Lord had forgiven me. Within 30 seconds, I told Dave, “I have to forgive you!” It was an act of my will. I did not feel like forgiving, but I put my trust in God, and I did.

The next few days were the most intimate times with God I have encountered in my life. With my extending forgiveness to Dave, Jesus could start healing the pain and grief I was experiencing. I cried out to God with my feelings of anger and betrayal, but my times with Him ended in love. He brought me to Colossians 3:14 in Dave’s Promise Keepers Bible, “Love is more important than anything else; it is what ties everything completely together.” I screamed at God, “Why didn’t you let me know this so I could help him?!” Jesus gave me parts of Psalm 91, “Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, ‘He is my refuge and my fortress, My God in whom I trust.’” Then He changed the next part for me, “’Because (she) loves Me,’ says the Lord, ‘I will rescue (her); I will protect (her), for (she) acknowledges My name.’” Then the room filled with the sweet presence of God, and I heard his voice saying, “I kept this knowledge from you for your own protection and for David’s. Your trust had to remain high. The decisions were David’s to make until My healing was complete. Your trust must still be strong. The old man has gone away and a new creation stands before you. Look not to the past but to the road I have laid before you both! Keep your eyes on Me!” Little did I know what that meant!

The Lord had us go through the Living Waters Program, where I learned to forgive my childhood abuser. He led us to start our own ministry, Simon Ministries for married couples, attend Living Waters Leadership Training, and begin leading the program in our own church for eight years.

The Lord has allowed me to share with those who have been sexually abused, those who have gone through infertility, miscarriages, adoption, those working with special needs children and now with wives whose husbands are struggling with same-sex attractions. Since Dave has been ‘called out’ of homosexuality and daily walking out his healing with Jesus, the Lord has taken us from coast to coast to share our testimony.

We closed Simon Ministries in 2010 and joined forces with Outpost where our healing first began. Dave still works with men dealing with SSA in the group CalebSpirit. I am working with wives struggling with forgiveness and trust in their marriages in our group Simon Refuge. I enjoy watching Jesus at work!

As a side note, we adopted a second son, Paul, who is a joy to us. But our first severely retarded son, Luke (we gave him a physician’s name), graduated from a Christian high school with a 3.0 GPA, has a college degree from University of Northwestern—St. Paul, worked for Billy Graham at Amsterdam 2000 and was just married on May 6th. His doctor stated that she had never seen a child reach normal let alone surpass it! To her, Luke is a miracle!

The Lord has loved me so much He has given me walking miracles in my house. I especially thank Jesus everyday for the gift of David as my husband. Last September we celebrated 45 years of marriage, and I would not change one minute of it. I have learned trust, forgiveness, and unconditional love and we have brought each other closer to God.

Filed Under: Archive, How Do I Change?, How Do I Live Out My Faith?, Is Freedom Possible?, Is Healing Possible in My Marriage?, Outpost News Tagged With: , , ,